Deep Thoughts

Do you ever wonder what people will say about you when you are gone?

April has been every ounce of cruelty promised in the poem below. I am watching out my window as the wind blows snow slightly to the west, bound and determined to snub the remaining tulips, daffodils, and hyacinth. My mood is as grim as the sky.  In between surgeries. At a crossroads in my marriage. Buried in self doubt.  Moored only by my son, drifting on a sea of grey, where there are days that even he drifts from me. .....

I think they will just say that I was a sad woman.

HURRY UP PLEASE ITS TIME

A little set back....

Went in for my fill today.  It's my first to last.  My left breast has some bruising that has to be watched.  I am hoping it is just the skin being weird, not a full on infection, but they did put me back on the antibiotics.

I have had MRSA so I know what to look for.  The wonderful PA I see outlined the area so I can watch for spreading.  It's all very clinical and logical as these things go. We are not doing my last fill until a week from now.  Taking a week off to make sure I heal properly.   I do feel like I have a cold coming on.  I feel awful and tired from not being able to sleep properly.

My husband is in India, and I don't really have anyone to lean on, to worry on.  Believe me, I worry on people, not to people.  I am often surprised that my husband doesn't buckle under the weight of it.

Not a fantastic day.